Driver from India

I landed in US just 10 days ago. Right now am in Waukegan, this is close to Chicago. Public transportation is not available and when its cold here it's always sub-zero temperature.
Without a car you can't imagine life here. It's necessary.

I was trying to rent a car from almost 3-4 days, but was unable to do so. It was all because of dependency. I haven't driven a car in a road with a lot of traffic. Till now my experience with car was riding them on a plain playing ground or mostly on a road without traffic. Total experience of driving adding all may lead upto an hour.

Due to the dependency I was trying to get help from any of my colleague, so that they may drive with me upto the renting enterprise and then I may drive back under their guidance. Once you are in US or any onsite, people are helpful only if they know you. This has been my personal experience. I asked one of my colleague to accompany me. he was busy, another one just gave me a vague reply which am still unable to comprehend. One colleague agreed to take me to the place, there we waited for 30 mins, had coffee, eventually my car arrived. At this time my colleague said he got to leave, I really got irritated, I said fine.

Here I was now, 0 experience of driving and in one of the busiest traffic city I was going to try a car. I thought fine, worst I will bang someone's car so I will do it. I started it slowly and reached at the place where I had to cross the road to take a turn left. There was a divider, the left and right side of the road were not on same level. I overlooked and well my one tire was hanging on the other side of divider and rest three on the other side. Now I was pushing peddle to move forward it wasn't (thank god that it didn't else it would have really damged the vehicle) and it was not even moving backwards. I came out in a thinking mode what to do. I was not carrying cell (I dont have one till now). I was wondering what to do? I thought let Police Patrol come by, may be they will fine me but atleast they will take the car outta shit. Suddenly two man, came from nowhere and give me a helping hand. One of them said that put the vehicle in reverse, and we will push the car from front. I asked one of the man to steer the vehicle as I lost confidence which I was trying to build. He did it for me. We pushed the vehicle and it came out at last. I was already shaken by this and now I was supposed to take the car back to my office (Abbott).

I started driving really carefully, looking at each and everything, then also I think I missed a lotta rules. I tried to configure my GPS for the office (Abbott) but was unable to do so, later my friend told me that Abbott map is not available in GPS. Now I lost the track entirely, I was really slow, people were honking horns and I was always in the wrong lane. I was unable to stop the vehicle in between as I was worried of the huge traffic behind me. Finally at a place where traffic was somewhat less I reconfigured the GPS for my home address, the GPS showed the direction and I started for the way, real long way.

Very slowly, getting instructions from GPS and violating a lot of rules, I didn't even used indicator anywhere. GPS said for a left turn, I took it, then I realised I took it early. Retraced the whole path again, took the next turn left, GOD this was again wrong, retraced the same path again. Now I was in the right direction. Really slowly finally I reached my destination.

This was kind of stupid for me, as I really violated many rules and this could have been a loss of life or anything serious, am still shaken for this. I think I enjoyed it but, there was thrill am still shaken while writing this, but I will consider this as my achievement. Driving when you never drive.

Thrill of Life

This is the mail which I posted to my college group.

Hi Group,

There was a line in movie Hitch "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take. Life is measured by the moments that take our breath away."

Just commenting on the thrills of the life, how many of us are succumbed to the monotonous and routine life ? Are we people bringing enough changes in life? Are there ample spices indeed in our life?

Asking here a big question to all of you, do you had the moments which took your breath away ? or some of us are still waiting for those moments to happen in our life. Lemme tell, for those who had their share of breath taking moments a real applause. You really faced something n lemme tell you it makes you a better human being whether they were happy moments or not.

Mine has been with a lot of changes in the past few months, bruised, attacked, had been a pure soul, had been wid a devil inside me. It had been awsome overall when I look back. Am still struggling to get the track of the things (please stop the curiousities over here), but yeah I am better human being and more honest.

I am having really a few good friends and with them I learned a lot. One of them said to me while we were having some silly philosphical discussions, that why do you think that you lost something in your life? why dont you take it as you have gained also the things which other's haven't.

I concluded while analyzing the happy moments n sorrowful moments (as we distinguish things), that the nature creates balance, kaise bhi...If you get something at the same time you loose something and vice verse. It's just we always consider the gaining part in happiness n losing is really not in our character.

The thrill part, I found thrills in doing the things which are forbidden. This has been intercepted to me since childhood, I try my best to get away from the norms. I enjoyed like hell, I grieved like hell, had multiple scenarios in my mind, still rambling wid a few of them. When I just think its a lot of junk, but it helps in metamorphosis and Goddamn am learning and still learning.

Getting back to the thrill, try living life to the edge, if everything is balanced try creating some imbalances and please do what you have always wanted to do. Life has a lot to offer, and its just one single life. If you can please share your thrills as well. Go for adventure, drink like anything (but maintain capability to leave it anytime), keep multiple gf's bf's ( You should not cheat as well, difficult but thrilling and appaling), whatever. Keep calling people names, keep distubing your colleagues (maintaining balance). Not all of us are capable of bringing disturbance to this nature. Lets try it !

Someone said it right "Life is a series of strange and mysterious things, one minute you think you're up, the next you find you're down"

Keep writing....

Luv

Devil Ashu

Will always be present !

तुम नही तो क्या ? हम उपस्थित है ।
तुम नही तो क्या ? फिर भी अर्पित है ।
हमसे या ख़ुद से भयभीत न हो ।
आज भी हम वही है, जो कभी थे।

तुम सोचो मत की सब परिवर्तित हुआ,
यही होना था बस आभास न हुआ।
समय तब भी था, अब भी है,
आज भी हम वही है, जो कभी थे।

मन से शंका निकल दो,
तुम ध्रिणा ना होगे, तब भी हम है,
जब हम ऋण होंगे, तब तुम होगे।
धीरे धीरे सब कट जायेगा,
थोडी सी पीडा, अवश्य दे जायेगा।

आभास है हमें, हम महत्वपूर्ण है,
तुम्हारे बिना थोड़े से अपूर्ण है।
पूर्ण होना उचित नही,
थोडी से कमी विचित्र ही सही।

अब साथ तो दूँगा नही, इसलिए स्वतंत्र रहो,
मेरे लिए अब और प्रश्न न करो।
लिखित मन तुम्हारे लिए नही, हमारे लिए है,
पर प्रश्न सिर्फ़ मेरे लिए नही।
उत्तर की प्रतीक्षा ना करो, बस अब उन्मुक्त रहो।

मुझे सहानुभूति नही अच्छे विचार चाहिए,
तुम नही तो क्या?
मेरा पूरा संसार है और,
मुझे पूरा की पूरा चाहिए।

Longing for the past.

मस्तिष्क पटल में तुम्ही अंकित हो ।
अब भी मेरे लिए समर्पित हो।
सिर्फ मैंने परिपक्वता का रुप देखा।
तुमने मुझे मगरूर देखा ।

अब भी तुम्हे कभी कभी याद करते है,
उन क्षणों का ध्यान करते है।
कितनी प्रतीक्षा करवाता था मैं,
कितना अपने भाग्य पे इठलाता था मैं।

लाड प्यार को अधिकार सा समझा,
तुम्हारे प्यार को समझ के भी ना समझा ।
क्षण तुम्हारे साथ व्यतीत करने का मन तो था,
पर मस्तिष्क को यकीन दिलाने का बहाना ना था।

उन क्षणों को ध्यान करता हूँ,
आज भी उसी घेरे के इर्द गिर्द अपने को पता हूँ।
निर्भीक मैं कभी था नही,
ह्रदय में रहते हुए भी जिव्हा पे आया ना कभी।

चाहो तो इसे अंहकार समझो,
चाहो तो इसे प्यार समझो।