Saturday, January 31, 2009

Dream On....

Once again am here to create my own space. Sometimes I dream, sometimes I remember and sometimes I forget. When I remember those dreams, I always try to interpret the hidden meaning behind them. No.....don't even think that I have read Sigmund Freud (Interpretation of Dreams), they are just dreams and I treat them my way.

Long back in Kolkata, the first day when I shifted to a new place (I lived almost for 2 years at this place), I had a dream. I saw a friend of mine as a ghost, I was aghast, and shivering with the sensation of it. That moment only I started wandering that, why did I saw this dream, it never came back though. I tried to derive the meaning out of it, that is this a warning ? or some kind of a message that the future will deliver. I thought over it many times, I laughed that its not possible, that person can't be a ghost. Eventually I forgot it completely.

Later stages, I had my share of turmoils in life and it was up to some extent due to association with the same person. I languished for the same, and I realized that the dream was entirely true. It was indeed a warning which I let pass. It was clearly indicated to me that this person will haunt you. I should have given due weightage to that dream of mine. Anyways over the time my close friends keep reminding that, am a nagger, who always keep feeding dirt to the past. Henceforth I will not shovel more that why I didn't followed my conscience.

I quit smoking. It's almost around 7 months. Yesternite in sleep, I saw myself smoking. This was the second time that I saw myself smoking in dream. In dream I even, cursed myself after smoking, that why I did it and once again am back to this stupid stuff. I was also craving to smoke in the dream. A few months back I was in Germany, there people used to smoke anywhere, everywhere. I was just scolding myself that, why didn't I waited for more time to quit.

Over the time, I don't feel like smoking any more. I don't even know that smoking falls into my hidden desires or not ? I am still rambled with the dream, what it was signifying ?

Was it signifying the burnt desires or the ashes over time ?
May be it was signifying the ones who let themselves burnt for the salvage of mine ?
Was it saying me to to go back in the clouds of smoke so that I can't see any faces ?
Was it showing me, the all rest, no more pieces,the destiny of mine ?

Friday, January 23, 2009

All I wanna do is (BANG BANG BANG BANG!)

This is just a part of the lyrics of a song in Slumdog Millionaire,"Paper Planes" . First about the movie...I watched it first time online, okay ! what's so incrdible ? (Actually I watched it really with sleeping eyes.) Second time I again watched it (I had too, as it won so many awards and I had to see if its worth it). Definitely the movie is good and portrays some of the basic humanism found in the street of mumbai.

This second time made me hooked to the soundtrack of the music. It's fabulous, am not going to write about all that, but only about the one "Paper-Planes". Great lyrics and it was originally written by Mathangi "Maya" Arulpragasam(M.I.A), better there is an acronym for the name, as a few can spell it. Am listening even to the song while writing all this crap.

There is a statement underneath the song (My strong belief is, feeling for any song or poem or any stuff varies from person to person. This may be termed as the product of "state of mind in which an individual is".) I am attached to the song. I don't want to care for the world, want to be a Jack and a Master in all trades (notorious ones). The Paper-Planes reminds me of all the things which I wanted to do and still want to do.

A lady who sits besides me at workplace(overheard the song N times) asked me so it's Paper-Planes again ? I just smiled, we all know about the "Paper-Planes", atleast we were supposed to know.

The Paper-Planes were the things of childhood, there were many methods to make them,.I remember the Rockets (folding the paper and using a rubber band to shoot it over people). These Paper-Planes represented the freedom which we had. This we exercised by making the planes land over to the pretty gals in the class.

Why we don't take the life in a same manner. Are there enough of quandaries which we can't solve ? We missed a lot of Paper Planes, we make them again, every time with a new hope, this one will fly and this one will fly to the flyiest(the new term for the apogee - highest attainable).

The childhood gleamed with what we all wanted to do, the freedom which a Plane exercised over the landing. The Planes never cared about the landing in the forbidden area, irrespective of the direction of flying. The forbidden area reminds me of the "Forbidden Apple", which eventually helped for the Paradise Lost.

Let's start building the same Paper-Planes and pursue the forbidden, a few may have "The Paradise" with them, what about those who don't have any but only "Papers.....for the Plane"

"I fly like paper, get high like planes,
If you catch me at the border I got visas in my name,
If you come around here, I make 'em all day,
I get one down in a second if you wait "